Bad jokes

[Warren]

What has 2 legs and lives off dead beetles?

Yoko Ono!

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

So i was washing my truck with my son over the weekend...
He aske me “dad, can you use a sponge next time?”

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

I got pulled over on my way home from work today. The cop comes to my window and says “papers?” So i said “ scissors, i win!” And i drove off. Hes chased me for 45 min.. i think he wanted a rematch

 

[Cathie G]

What kind of picture does a tortoise take?
A shelfie.

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

What kind of picture does a tortoise take?
A shelfie.

My fav teacher at school was named Mrs Turtle..
Strange name but she tortoise well

 

[Humbug & Maz]

My fav teacher at school was named Mrs Turtle..
Strange name but she tortoise well

CRYING! ?

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

CRYING! ?

Dont be sad.. ur prob still smarter than me lol

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

Besides shes now homeless... she carries her home on her back

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

A guy broke into a church.. the cops showed up and chased him around until they finally caught him by the organ

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

*naked guy

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

I blew that joke... wait ? not the way i should of worded that

 

[Warren]

I blew that joke... wait ? not the way i should of worded that

So what are you saying is, that you play the organ. LOL

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

So what are you saying is, that you play the organ. LOL

U used to.. until covid hit and the price of tissues skyrocketed

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

*I smh

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

Anyone else got shutoff at church? Dont serve wine if u dont want me to enjoy it

 

[Snoopy’s mom]

Dude.

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

Dudet

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

Dude.

I take that as a yes lol

 

[Cathie G]

U used to.. until covid hit and the price of tissues skyrocketed

How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogy in it ?

 

[Chubbs the tegu]

How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogy in it ?

If u call it a boogie.. or little hahah