Need a womans advice ( again) others feel free to chime in.

[dmmj]

So as most of you may know there is a woman I am infatuated with, I see her once a week we chat about stuff,. Well I have been wondering if a small christmas gift would be appropriate? Now our chats have been progressing last week we talked about thanksgiving day plans. So I was thinking of giving a gift to her my main concern is she might get freaked out or something. now the gift I was thinking about is I make those tie quilts for family and friends, every time a baby that gets born in my family gets one on their first birthday, I have been doing this for a long time and they quickly become cherished items, plus they are warm. So I was thinking of making one for her and giving it to her my thinking about this would be every time she uses it she would think of me, what better way could I accomplish this then that? My concern like I said is the freak out factor I am 99 percent sure she is interested. so if a guy who you liked gave you something like this would you like it? would it weird you out? thoughts comments all are appreciated.

 

[Jacqui]

David, you could give me one any time you want! For me, it would convey a lot about you (and all good things). It would actually melt my heart. I would say go for it. One of the major reasons being your too shy to take that first step on your own. This very personal gift from you, could do that for you. A bridge between being just customer and trying for a friendship.

 

[cherylim]

I agree with Jacqui, but would also remind you not to be too disheartened if it seems like it's not taken too well.

If I received that gift, I'd probably accept it shyly. I'd say thanks, but I'd probably be too embarrassed to keep talking to you there and then. It would take me a week or two to get back to chatting to you, but at least I'd know your intentions and could move things on from there.

 

[Kristina]

Are you kidding me? A hand made item from a guy that is somewhat outside of the realm of typical "guy made things" (I mean, something other than a gun rack! )

I'd melt like butter. I think it sounds like a wonderful, thoughtful gift!

 

[jaizei]

I do not think you should give her a gift. If you are that sure she is interested, then bite the bullet and make a move.

 

[Yvonne G]

I'm afraid I'm going to have to disagree with most and agree with jaizei. Don't give her a gift until you've at least asked her out for coffee or a coke.

Have you talked to her about the quilts? Does she know that you make them and has she expressed an interest in them.

I just think it would freak her out to receive a gift from someone she has just talked to as a customer and never actually had any personal time with.

 

[Jacqui]

I just think it would freak her out to receive a gift from someone she has just talked to as a customer and never actually had any personal time with.

I guess I think of it as being pretty normal, because I have been gifted (as were my cashiers by different folks) often back when I worked overnights at WalMart.

 

[Kristina]

I too, as a cosmetologist, received many gifts throughout the holiday season, both from men and women.

 

[CtTortoiseMom]

I think you should make your intentions clear and ask her out first and foremost.

 

[cemmons12]

Well I am not a woman but I think it is a very nice idea. But what do I know?

 

[Tony the tank]

Well I'm not a chick...But I would recommend the direct approach... Just ask her out.. Sometimes gifts make people feel funny.....if she excepts the dinner or lunch invite ...Then you can move on to the gift...

....Don't forget you are CAPTAIN AWESOME....

 

[bigred]

Well I would say buy her a tortoise. Ive been married 3 times so Im not even gonna give any advice if you know what I mean. hahahaha and yes im serious

 

[Laura]

make the move to have a drink.. if she accepts.. give it to her then.. or if the drink date goes well. make a second date and give it to her at that time..
Do you have a theme for the quilt? something she likes? colors?
people can act weird about gifts.. some love them and others will feel more pressured.. it could backfire.. but if it doenst.. then who hoo!
Ask her out first..

 

[ascott]

Captain is this the gal you shared of before, where you stop for coffe and donuts? If so, then good going on keeping the conversations going

I would say that you will put love and dedication into making the quilt....I would personally feel indebted to the person that gave me the hand made, time consuming, beautiful quilt....what I mean is that if I were not interested in the same way it may make me feel a little off...as well as I do not think that I could accept it if my feelings were not truly in line with yours....and as a woman honestly she would have to know your feelings by now, you know? So I would say grab the reigns and ask the lady out, there are only two things that could happen she says yes and you all take it from there, she says no and you all take it from there....I would personally like and appreciate this approach much better....I then can smile and accept or smile and decline while still appreciating your growing friendship .....

Now on another note: since I have spoken with you lots...and enjoy the sharing here on the forum...."I" on the other hand would absolutely think it completely lovely if you felt compelled to make me a quilt (my fav colors are anything that relate to our beautiful earth....)

Hey Cap.....GO FOR IT, YOU CAN DO IT !!!!!

---

Cap....I don't know if too many people truly appreciate matters of the heart as they did in days gone by....I don't know if folks truly cherish the purest form of the heart...which is to be able to act fully and childlike in the funnest compliment of the meaning....so you know what.....do what makes you feel good and right.....do what it is that makes you exactly you.....if the gal does not "get you" then it is likely she is not the one that is deserving of you....and if she is, well then hell there ya go

I think that sometimes folks worry too much about what someone might think of us if we share what we feel as though if the feelings are not the same the world will suddenly stop spinning.....I think you should do exactly what your heart tells you and if you hit the mark then awesome....and if you don't there is a saying that I have always felt to be 100% true;

"It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all"

Good wishes to you which ever you decide Cap

 

[ALDABRAMAN]

I'm afraid I'm going to have to disagree with most and agree with jaizei. Don't give her a gift until you've at least asked her out for coffee or a coke.

Have you talked to her about the quilts? Does she know that you make them and has she expressed an interest in them.

I just think it would freak her out to receive a gift from someone she has just talked to as a customer and never actually had any personal time with.

I agree 100%.

 

[Angi]

I would say that it is a good idea if you are giving it to her because she is your favorite waitress . If it is just because you like her then it is not a good idea unless you have developed a friendship. I was a waitress for many years and got gifts around the holidays and really enjoyed it. Big tips were great but I also loved it when I got a home made pumpkin pie every Thanksgiving and Christmas or something that let me know they thought highly of me..
What freaked me out was getting a dozen long stemmed roses. What I hated was guys who treated me different after I turned them down for a date. If you haven't asked this girl out yet, just do it. Ask her out for coffee or lunch, if she says no then you know she just wants to be friends. But at least you will know and you can just work on being a friend. Oh ya and let us know what happends.

 

[TurtleTortoise]

Do something smaller first and slowly work up to it.

 

[DesertGrandma]

I'm afraid I'm going to have to disagree with most and agree with jaizei. Don't give her a gift until you've at least asked her out for coffee or a coke.

Have you talked to her about the quilts? Does she know that you make them and has she expressed an interest in them.

I just think it would freak her out to receive a gift from someone she has just talked to as a customer and never actually had any personal time with.

I agree too. Get off your butt and ask her out before she thinks you aren't interested. A special gift such as a handmade quilt can come after you have established a "relationship."
I agree 100%.

 

[Maggie Cummings]

IF you know what she is interested in, like me with Dale Earnhardt, if she's interested in horses, or NASCAR or flowers. If you know exactly what she is interested in I say make a quilt about that, whatever is her theme and give it to her. I personally would love something like that. BUT...BUT...you are getting advice from someone who has never made a relationship work...

 

[terryo]

What is a tie quilt? I think you should ask her out first, before giving a beautiful hand made gift. It might be different if the gift were something that you didn't put so much time into...like a little token gift that people usually give to teachers, etc. I can't believe you still didn't ask her out. If you ask her out now and have a few dates before Christmas, then the quilt will be a good thing, but not before you go out with her.