Damned DUCKS!

[ZEROPILOT]

This is probably a south Florida problem. But I have an issue with ducks.
More specifically with ducks pooping all over my porch.
We do not feed them. Are not kind to them. We chase them away and throw things at them. But, they keep returning to spray their disease ridden poop all over my front porch.
Any ideas what I can do? Other than Googling duck recipes?
I placed the bench inside my garage. Convinced that they liked the shade it provided. And it worked for just one day.
This morning they returned.
I'm getting very annoyed.
I do not want to harm them. And frankly, I'm not sure that even that would deter them. They're as stupid as they are stubborn.

 

[SuzanneZ]

Knock on doors and ask until somebody confesses. Ask for them to be put up.

 

[ZEROPILOT]

Knock on doors and ask until somebody confesses. Ask for them to be put up.

No
These are wild, local ducks.
Muscovy and Egyptian.
But only the Muscovy ducks crap on my porch. And lay eggs in my planters.

 

[TammyJ]

Do they fly or walk into your yard? Would a fence keep them out?

 

[Blackdog1714]

Buy a smoker with a hanging rack for Peking duck or buy a motion activated sprinkler

 

[jeff kushner]

I like BD's idea.....motion activated....with a solar power supply panel so you don't have to mess with it.

An Owl on a rail so it moves? Or a motion activated "spinny thing" that you could tie string & bells to?

A large plastic owl?

I look out my back window and saw this and wondered, "Why is Dustin putting a Hawk on top of his bird feeders?"

Then the Hawk turned to look at me! You don't see any other birds around it though, right?

Excuse me, I have to coughbbgun, cough, cough....

 

[SinLA]

I've tried "fake" hawks for morning doves (which I have to believe are very possibly the stupidest birds on the planet) with no success. Other than fencing in your porch I don't have a solution for you...

 

[TammyJ]

Zeropilot, despite the ducks, I hope you had a wonderful Birthday!
Not changing the subject...back to the ducks...!

 

[jeff kushner]

Good eye Tammy, Happy Birthday Z!


NOW, back to ducks.....

 

[wellington]

You might try some of these in picture. You could also make your own from CD's. The shiny sparkles makes them stay away, hopefully. You might even get some from a dollar store.

 

[SuzanneZ]

Looks like mole deterrent whirlies and children's toys. Great non- violent idea. 🥰

 

[Megatron's Mom]

We had Muscovy ducks. Very interesting type of meat. It's a red meat much more like steak.

Sprinklers won't work, they're ducks after all and love water. A dog might work, but Muscovy ducks can be pretty mean so you would need a dog who would not run off.

I saw a guy on a YT video that his neighbors would call and he took care of any unwanted ducks. I'm sure he has a nice full freezer.

 

[ZEROPILOT]

Do they fly or walk into your yard? Would a fence keep them out?

They just walk. Even though technically they CAN fly.

 

[ZEROPILOT]

We had Muscovy ducks. Very interesting type of meat. It's a red meat much more like steak.

Sprinklers won't work, they're ducks after all and love water. A dog might work, but Muscovy ducks can be pretty mean so you would need a dog who would not run off.

I saw a guy on a YT video that his neighbors would call and he took care of any unwanted ducks. I'm sure he has a nice full freezer.

The last time I was in Las Vegas I did see MUSKOVY duck on a menu.
Kinda made me nauseous. And I do like duck.
These guys are disgusting.
It's an unusually good duck mother. Usually there will be 8 to 12 babies. And after a week or two it'll be down to 2 or 3.
This duck had 12 tiny fluff balls. And 11 of them have survived almost to adulthood.
Today I chased them down the sidewalk at least 5 houses away. And as I was driving to work I saw them waddling back towards my house.
Why MY HOUSE?

 

[SinLA]

The last time I was in Las Vegas I did see MUSKOVY duck on a menu.
Kinda made me nauseous. And I do like duck.
These guys are disgusting.
It's an unusually good duck mother. Usually there will be 8 to 12 babies. And after a week or two it'll be down to 2 or 3.
This duck had 12 tiny fluff balls. And 11 of them have survived almost to adulthood.
Today I chased them down the sidewalk at least 5 houses away. And as I was driving to work I saw them waddling back towards my house.
Why MY HOUSE?

Because you are just Ducky!

 

[SuzanneZ]

They just walk. Even though technically they CAN fly.

I had Muscovees long ago. Just interesting creatures. Not classed with ducks, not classed with anything. They're Muscovees! They have a front claw they use to pull themselves up trees with if they feel like it.

 

[TammyJ]

Put food for them in someone else's yard. Screen off your porch. Get a barking dog alarm.

 

[Cathie G]

The last time I was in Las Vegas I did see MUSKOVY duck on a menu.
Kinda made me nauseous. And I do like duck.
These guys are disgusting.
It's an unusually good duck mother. Usually there will be 8 to 12 babies. And after a week or two it'll be down to 2 or 3.
This duck had 12 tiny fluff balls. And 11 of them have survived almost to adulthood.
Today I chased them down the sidewalk at least 5 houses away. And as I was driving to work I saw them waddling back towards my house.
Why MY HOUSE?

Sorry I can't help but laugh and I absolutely love hate ducks! Ducks are nuts. Happy birthday though 🥳 sounds like one of mine. gee mon y 😁 and don't let Google tell you mascovies are nice. They ain't native but they're still protected and the laws are ridiculous. You can't even gather duck eggs every morning for breakfast.

 

[Megatron's Mom]

The last time I was in Las Vegas I did see MUSKOVY duck on a menu.
Kinda made me nauseous. And I do like duck.
These guys are disgusting.
It's an unusually good duck mother. Usually there will be 8 to 12 babies. And after a week or two it'll be down to 2 or 3.
This duck had 12 tiny fluff balls. And 11 of them have survived almost to adulthood.
Today I chased them down the sidewalk at least 5 houses away. And as I was driving to work I saw them waddling back towards my house.
Why MY HOUSE?

They know you won't eat them. I don't either, my husband on the other hand is a totally different story.

Sounds like this mommy found a safer place to keep her babies.

 

[Megatron's Mom]

Sorry I can't help but laugh and I absolutely love hate ducks! Ducks are nuts. Happy birthday though 🥳 sounds like one of mine. gee mon y 😁 and don't let Google tell you mascovies are nice. They ain't native but they're still protected and the laws are ridiculous. You can't even gather duck eggs every morning for breakfast.

Not protected at all in Florida. They actually recommend to take the eggs to reduce the population. They don't consider them wildlife as they came from domesticated stock. That must be why that YT guy was talking about it so freely. I thought he was nuts saying what he was doing on YT.