Need mainly a woman's opinions but others are welcome

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John

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Cfr200 said:
Don't listen to guys who have been married for years, that is like your pet giving a wild animal advice on how to survive in the wild. Just ask her if she would like to sit down with you on her break and talk a few minutes. You will learn all you need to know from this little no pressure chat.
[/quote)Nice analogy, rings of someone of inexperience, why would ya listen to the guy who hasn't been to the super bowl, or the opposing team, over the guy who has made it and can sustain it?:)
 

wrmitchell22

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You never know if you don't try. It is really hard to say if she is just being polite and interested in chit chat because you are a regular and she "knows" you or if she has a sincere interest. Many women wait for the man to make the move so to speak, so the ball is in your court. I really like the idea of asking if she is seeing anyone, it is less forward and you avoid rejection because you aren't asking her out your just asking a question. Good Luck, let us know how it goes. For the record, I asked out a lot of people before meeting my husband, rejection comes with the territory, look at it this way, with each rejection you are closer to finding the person you want to be with. I met my husband on eharmony. :D

Jessicap said:
It sounds like you don't want a committed relationship anyway so what would the difference be if she says no? Fiind out what kind of things interest her (during your conversations ask lots of questions... and then LISTEN) If there is an event coming up (it is fair season) let her know you where planning on attending and ask if she would be interested in coming along. Ask like you would any other friend. (Think of her as just one of the guys... lol)

This is great advice! :D
 

matt41gb

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I met my wife at the animal clinic I work at. She would bring her cat in all the time, but I hadn't actually met its owner. One day when we were really slow, she came to pick her cat up. I just so happened to bring her cat up and when I saw her, I just couldn't function, ha! We were super slow that day, so we ended up talking for about 30 min. I'm super shy at first, so I had no idea that she was interested in me at all. She's a school teacher and she gave me her tutoring business card that had her number on it. I had no idea that she was giving me a huge hint to call her. She would come in from time to time with her cat, but we were always too busy to talk. One day about six months later I just couldn't stand it anymore. I called her up and I was shaking like a leaf. Luckily she didn't answer and I left her a voice mail. She ended up calling me back about 30 minutes later. We were engaged 7 months later and married the next year.

You never know what will happen unless you overcome your shyness and just go for it. Don't worry about rejection, just be confident and ask her out. You have nothing to lose!!!!

-Matt
 

Angi

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I would start by asking her how she is and what she has been up to next time she asks you how you are. If she says a quick fine thanks you could be reading her wrong. If she gives a more personal answer, then ask her out for coffee, lunch or to go somewhere you may both enjoy, but keep the first date light NOT romantic or expensive. Kristina, Skyler and several others gave very good advice. Good luck.
 

GeoTerraTestudo

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matt41gb said:
I met my wife at the animal clinic I work at. She would bring her cat in all the time, but I hadn't actually met its owner. One day when we were really slow, she came to pick her cat up. I just so happened to bring her cat up and when I saw her, I just couldn't function, ha! We were super slow that day, so we ended up talking for about 30 min. I'm super shy at first, so I had no idea that she was interested in me at all. She's a school teacher and she gave me her tutoring business card that had her number on it. I had no idea that she was giving me a huge hint to call her. She would come in from time to time with her cat, but we were always too busy to talk. One day about six months later I just couldn't stand it anymore. I called her up and I was shaking like a leaf. Luckily she didn't answer and I left her a voice mail. She ended up calling me back about 30 minutes later. We were engaged 7 months later and married the next year.

You never know what will happen unless you overcome your shyness and just go for it. Don't worry about rejection, just be confident and ask her out. You have nothing to lose!!!!

-Matt

I love that story!
 

matt41gb

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GeoTerraTestudo said:
matt41gb said:
I met my wife at the animal clinic I work at. She would bring her cat in all the time, but I hadn't actually met its owner. One day when we were really slow, she came to pick her cat up. I just so happened to bring her cat up and when I saw her, I just couldn't function, ha! We were super slow that day, so we ended up talking for about 30 min. I'm super shy at first, so I had no idea that she was interested in me at all. She's a school teacher and she gave me her tutoring business card that had her number on it. I had no idea that she was giving me a huge hint to call her. She would come in from time to time with her cat, but we were always too busy to talk. One day about six months later I just couldn't stand it anymore. I called her up and I was shaking like a leaf. Luckily she didn't answer and I left her a voice mail. She ended up calling me back about 30 minutes later. We were engaged 7 months later and married the next year.

You never know what will happen unless you overcome your shyness and just go for it. Don't worry about rejection, just be confident and ask her out. You have nothing to lose!!!!

-Matt

I love that story!

Thank you! I love telling it.

-Mat
 

zoogrl

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ASK HER!! I have a very similar story to Matt - I work at a vet clinic & my fiance and I met because he got a puppy (german shep - Alexus) and started bringing her to daycare. I would chat with most of the regulars when they came to pick up but really enjoyed talking to him & could just tell he was a nice guy. I even commented to one of the girls I work with that he is a nice guy & needs a nice girl! One day he called the clinic after he picked up the dog & asked me out. I was blown away! He gave me his number and told me to call him, so 3 days later I finally called him! He still gives me a hard time for taking 3 days to call him back lol. We went for dinner and have been inseperable ever since! We are getting married in August. I would've never asked him out because I'm way too shy, but now 2 years later I can't imagine how life would be if he hadn't asked me out. According to him & his family it took him months to work up the courage to ask me out. ;)

A cup of coffee or a coke is just a getting to know you thing, keep the conversation light, ask about hobbies, music, pets. But most of all RELAX! Be you & just have fun
 

DixieParadise

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Ok, my take on the situation. Hope I am not too late jumping into this thread..

First of all I think you are asking for a woman's view, because you don't want to be hurt again. So, if you ask this girl out and she says "NO", you will probably chalk it up to...see I should not have gotten interested. And go on living your life being alone. Afraid to ask anyone else out for fear of rejection.

But if she says "Yes", who knows...She might be the one or not, but you won't know unless you try.

We miss so much in life because of our simplest fears. If you just do what your heart tells you to do, then your head will figure it out in time.

Do what our tortoises can't.... Step out of your shell and give it a shot.
 

Angi

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You could do something really crazy and go to this eatting place on a Monday....just saying....
 

DesertGrandma

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As one who has also had a problem in the past with men thinking I was flirting when actually just being friendly, I would say take it slow and ask a few revealing questions before asking for a date. Find out if she is single, what her hobbies are, does she have pets, where does she hang out for coffee, etc. I think when she realizes that you are interested, in some way she will let you know if she is interested in you or not. If she is not interested,you've lost nothing. If she is interested then ask her if she would like to meet someplace of her choice according to her hobbies in the morning or afternoon for a casual get together. Then just see how it goes. Good luck and let us know how it turns out.
 

onarock

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You need to be more like this guy. :)
eating020.jpg
 

Terry Allan Hall

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dmmj said:
So as you may or may not know I am single mainly by choice, but I think I would like someone to do stuff with, which brings me to my question. I go every tuesday to a fast food place ( yoshinoya) and every time I go there is this girl, cute, smart nice all the qualities I look for. So every time I go in she always ask me how I am doing, how things are, she works the drive thru I use the walk up counter, and she always comes by and talk and smiles. So I wonder is she just being nice? or something else else? I will admit I am gun shy around woman and as someone who has been shot down many many times, over the years I am little (hell little make that a lot) hesitant to ask anyone out period. Over the years it has jut been easier to not ask than risk rejection yet again. So opinions, I know it is hard to give advice like this over the internet, but I would appreciate any thoughts, comments, and what not you may have. Of course the worst part is I don't know if she likes turtles and tortoises but I will cross that bridge much later. I am not looking for anything serious right now, just someone to go out and do stuff with. so tell me am I being delusional? or does she show signs of interest? I would like mainly women's thoughts ( mainly because they would know better since they probably did similar stuff in the past) of course anyone who has any insight will be welcome to post or if you think I should just ignore it, that would be ok to, so tell me people.
Ok I will stop rambling now.

Do you want her to draw you a picture? ;)
 

fhintz

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As a 34 year old shy, single guy, who finds himself frequently confused by women, and how or if to approach them, I feel like I get where you're coming from. I know for myself, I always feel better if I force myself to at least have a conversation with girls that I run into regularly, even though it hasn't gone anywhere for me. So, I would say go for it, in terms of at least talking to her and finding out more about her, and then going from there.

Hope things work out well for you.

Frank
 

October

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So... Tuesday night has come and gone. Are you still scoping out the situation or did you chat with her? Inquiring minds want to know. :)
 
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