I think I may just suck at this.

BrookeB said:

Both leopards died today, only a hour apart. RIP Leo and Spots

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So sorry for your loss. It is so hard to lose them after working so very hard to keep them alive. Please don't beat yourself up over this. It sounds like you have done absolutely everything right.....I am guessing both of these sweet babies had a bad start and were never able to get past it and thrive. Please don't let this stop you from trying again.....they are definitely worth it.

I am so very sorry. Heartbreaking news!

I am so very sorry to hear about your loss! I had a baby sulcata that I got from some reptile store[cant remember the name right now] and he was sent to me sick, this forum tried to help me but the baby didn’t make it unfortunately. It was awful, my husband watched it happen and I have no idea how he managed to do that...but now I have a leopard tortoise named torque that I got from Tom and torque is doing great! Got torque as a hatchling and is now 2 years old and weighs almost 11lbs - it really does make a difference on who you buy from...but I am truly so sorry for your loss but don’t let this discourage you from wanting to get another one of these precious reptiles. Take up on Toms offer, he starts his babies out the right way and they thrive!! Torque is an absolute piggie who is thriving more and more each day

I am so saddened to hear of your struggles and your loss.
I had a sick mud turtle that I spent a year and a half trying to save: I made changes in her set up, changes in temperatures, changes in food, countless visits to the exotic vet, numerous hospitalizations at the exotics vet, visits to reptile specialists at the state veterinary school etc etc etc.
When we finally euthanized her, I felt like a failure and was emotionally exhausted and numb.

But not long before she died, I got a very healthy hatchling from a known breeder on the forum, to try and balance out my distress. He has grown flawlessly, is active and attentive and is a great joy.

I sincerely hope you will consider taking Tom up on his offer. You might be surprised how it can mend your heart when you feel like the Universe still trusts you to be a good and loving tortoise parent.

BIG HUG to you. ❤️

I'm so sorry for your loss. Please don't blame yourself, and I truly hope you get to experience a healthy tortoise when you're ready

Aw darn it. That's real sad news. I'm sorry this happened.

This is so tragic it breaks my heart. I am so very sorry

I just lost one of the sulcatas, his name was chip. I checked the temperatures in all enclosures and checked the humidity because I cannot believe that I’m losing them all at once. My kids are going to be devastated and I don’t even know what to say because I am just so upset. My 5 year old son wanted to bring the tortoises in to class next month and I had said yes before they where sick.. I was going to go with the tortoises to his class.. I just don’t know what to do. I’m literally sick to my stomach.

Oh my I'm so so very sorry to hear that. was Chip showing any symptoms of illness?

*Hugs*

BrookeB said:

I don’t think I can do this anymore, I wake up every morning hoping for improvement with my babies but every day it’s the same. They don’t eat, they barely move and they don’t open their eyes. According to everything on here the enclosures are perfect and their diet is perfect. I still go through the motions of “helping” them, weight, soak, eye drops, food, but it’s starting to feel hopeless. I feel like I’m just waiting for them to die. I really wanted to raise some babies but apparently I just suck at this.

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Don’t give up. See if there is a member in your area. Sending hugs

BrookeB said:

How/why does anyone stay in this hobby? When the animals die like this... It’s just breaking my spirit. I’ve literally had an easier time rehabilitating wild injured babies animals, then raising Any baby tortoise past 6 months. I feel like I literally bought them to watch them die.

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I think if you bought a baby from a bad source you will have problems. Pet stores or bad breeders can cause lots of problems that you cannot overcome.

BrookeB said:

I just lost one of the sulcatas, his name was chip. I checked the temperatures in all enclosures and checked the humidity because I cannot believe that I’m losing them all at once. My kids are going to be devastated and I don’t even know what to say because I am just so upset. My 5 year old son wanted to bring the tortoises in to class next month and I had said yes before they where sick.. I was going to go with the tortoises to his class.. I just don’t know what to do. I’m literally sick to my stomach.

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So sorry. You put in a lot of effort. Take Tom up on his offer. I’d jump at the chance to own one of his babies.!

So very sorry

BrookeB said:

I just lost one of the sulcatas, his name was chip. I checked the temperatures in all enclosures and checked the humidity because I cannot believe that I’m losing them all at once. My kids are going to be devastated and I don’t even know what to say because I am just so upset. My 5 year old son wanted to bring the tortoises in to class next month and I had said yes before they where sick.. I was going to go with the tortoises to his class.. I just don’t know what to do. I’m literally sick to my stomach.

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I am so so sorry to hear this keeps happening, just know it’s not your fault, you can’t help if you get hatchlings that aren’t started the right way - this breaks my heart to hear this because I remember that feeling with trooper the sulcata we lost...I know this is easier said than done right now but try to keep your head up and try to stay positive...when you’re ready please contact Tom...you won’t be disappointed or end up being devastated...again I am truly so sorry for the loss of your babies

Out of the 4 beautiful babies I bought for my birthday in September only 1 is still alive and I don’t expect him to live past another week. I don’t have words right now to express my sadness. It’s hitting me harder than I thought it would. I saw and knew the signs but... I was hoping that at least one of mine would be the exception. Leo, Dotts, Dozer, Chip I’m sorry little guys, I failed you

@BrookeB you didn't fail any of them. You did everything possible, please don't blame yourself.

I share in your sadness. It's heartbreaking.

So sorry this has happened. I thought about getting a leopard, but got a sulcata instead. It seems you did your best. Don't give up. I know its so sad when they die, but don't put so much blame on yourself. Good Luck

I totally agree, you did not fail any of them, it’s not your fault this happened

BrookeB said:

Unfortunately at this point I feel bad trying to force them to stay alive. They literally move 2-3 inches a Day. It was easier to save Frank from MBD when he was flat as a board and squishy.. I feel horrible watching this. Only one leopard is even trying to survive and he still can’t even move around, it makes me feel like crap. Please excuse my language.

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Hi BrookeB: I was looking back through all of your posts because I was curious if you have ever stated exactly what type and brand of substrate you are using? I noticed you had this exact same thing happen to you back in 2012 and lost babies then too; so I became curious about the fact that perhaps we have all missed something as simple as perhaps a substrate that might have some type of insecticide, herbicide, cedar or such. Many of the substrates are blends of mulches and can contain chemicals that for tiny babies can be fatally toxic, but a larger Tort may not be affected so badly. I did notice that you had been using a Reptile Fogger also, which made me wonder if some type of "mold" could be present. Also what type of water are you using in the fogger and if you are still using a fogger? Some water sources, especially here in California, have high levels of chlorine (Perchlorate) or in some regions agricultural fertilizer chemicals, that when present in the vapor state can be quite toxic. A fogger shouldn't be necessary to keep humidity up in a good closed chamber system. I also noticed that you were growing seeds in your enclosure, which back in 2012 you said they were from an organic source, but many seed companies, even organic, dip their seeds in mediums to boost their growing potential, which, if eaten by a young baby, could prove to be toxic. I am so sorry for your loss and hope you will try again after looking carefully at all the possible pitfalls.

Gijoux said:

Hi BrookeB: I was looking back through all of your posts because I was curious if you have ever stated exactly what type and brand of substrate you are using? I noticed you had this exact same thing happen to you back in 2012 and lost babies then too; so I became curious about the fact that perhaps we have all missed something as simple as perhaps a substrate that might have some type of insecticide, herbicide, cedar or such. Many of the substrates are blends of mulches and can contain chemicals that for tiny babies can be fatally toxic, but a larger Tort may not be affected so badly. I did notice that you had been using a Reptile Fogger also, which made me wonder if some type of "mold" could be present. Also what type of water are you using in the fogger and if you are still using a fogger? Some water sources, especially here in California, have high levels of chlorine (Perchlorate) or in some regions agricultural fertilizer chemicals, that when present in the vapor state can be quite toxic. A fogger shouldn't be necessary to keep humidity up in a good closed chamber system. I also noticed that you were growing seeds in your enclosure, which back in 2012 you said they were from an organic source, but many seed companies, even organic, dip their seeds in mediums to boost their growing potential, which, if eaten by a young baby, could prove to be toxic. I am so sorry for your loss and hope you will try again after looking carefully at all the possible pitfalls.

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Back years ago I bought my babies and I had them in an open type tortoise table, I also bought the sulcata from a local backyard breeder who told me they are Desert tortoises and that they don’t even need a water source. The leopard I got years ago was also not started well and I didn’t have the proper set up, the uv bulb was wrong for both enclosures and so was the heat lamp, and again I believe it was a bad source, the leopard never grew or wasn’t very active from the start. I was stubborn and didn’t believe the forum members until it was too late... although I did try, back then things might have been different if I had a proper set up from the start. I believe that 6 years ago it was 50-50 of fault of my babies passing.

This time, I really did everything the way I was supposed to. I listened to everything anyone suggested, I thought it was a good source for tortoises. But both now and then I have used zoo med coco Core, I cannot remember the source of the seeds from years ago but this time the seeds where specifically for growing for tortoises. They have no additives to the seeds and I found the soil mix here on the forum. I have not found any signs of mold, mildew or fungus and at this point I took out most of the stuff inside my newly empty enclosures. I checked everything probably 100 times. I found my source of the babies on here this time, although I have recently found out that the breeders they acquire their tortoises from raise their hatchlings the “old” way. The water source now is deep well water, and we had it tested a year ago, it’s not contaminated, no chlorine or chemicals.